I've been seeing a lot of people talk about 'situations that altered their brain chemistry',

& I can confidently say I knew of one situation in my life.

Now we've been through another, this time together.

It's been a bad couple of days,

Just general heavy-hearted-ness,

I haven't been motivated to do literally anything for the last 1 and a half months.

If the earlier experience kicked started my obsession with blood donation, this one just took me right out of it.

I don't even feel like talking to people, like anyone.

Stopped being able to make eye contact for some reason.

Then I just lay down at home any chance I get, mind buzzing, heart oh so heavy.

I know for a fact I've regressed quite an unhealthy amount.

But for now I do not have the energy to do anything about it yet.

What's exhausting is that I'm aware I need to do better.

It's the same old 'I have no rights or even any idea why I feel this way'.

But I just do not have the will to snap out of it.

It's all just... Exhaustion. Everything is so exhausting to think & feel & process.

So I just want to acknowledge this,

That today I cooked a fairly nutritious lunch for the kids,

I vacuumed somewhat,

I watered the plants,

I plan to fold some laundry,

& we shall call that a decent achievement in the life of a housewife.

& we'll do it all again tomorrow.