sherwood dark green

Diba, one of my kadet friends, just texted me her wedding invitation,

so i'm in such a reminiscing mood.

the first thought of the sri rampai girls are always melaka 05,

& watching them finishing our gajet.

then it starts going backwards,

to titiwangsa 05 (pemilihan kem perdana),

to buka puasa klcc,

to sarjan 04 prcc sungkai,

to pusako 04,

& it goes back & forth & swims around.

i actually pondered on the idea of whether there's anyone in this world who has it all now that that person doesn't miss one thing about their past, at all.

why do we always miss our past?

i'm not saying i want to be sixteen all over again,

but it'd be nice..

i remember feeling super cool everytime i go to a kursus/event,

because there's all these people that i know,

& of course i need to mention the fact that i had a super hot scandal at that time muahahah,

flashback kawad zon 05, ketua platun terbaik, jejaka kacak angkat thumbs up, cincinkudijarinya kehkehkeh

but still..

everytime i think about it i actually feel amazed,

& thankful,

& proud of myself, yes i am.

so yes, on to the first wedding of the gang!

dammit blog pakai laptop abah takleh post gambar.

last friday came & went without much fanfare.

fanfare is actually a weird word to be used to describe it,

but i can't think much right now.

all i know is, fanfare-less last friday is good.

though a lot of it is due to mind control, & making self ignorant,

but parts of it was genuine, the ignorance.

i'm tired of counting down days/weeks to the end of practical.

i am kind of afraid, kind of excited,

afraid of losing the momentum,

afraid of facing reality, working life, for good,

but excited for some more days of waking up late,

& staying up late,

worryless.

i remember having more things to write about at odd moments,

but being sick doesn't help much.

especially when the weekend flew by too fast,

& as weird as this may sound,

knowing that tomorrow at work there's no real work waiting to be done.

i hate being idle at the office.

i do.

because staring into space is such a crime,

& handing up a time sheet with more spaces is even bigger a crime.

this is for being a muse fan,

obsessed with 1984.

i'm currently living it :)

9 weeks to go? i think?

today marks exactly two months to finishing the internship.

which reminds me i haven't wished kiki happy birthday *bergegas ke fb seketika*

yeah so i've kinda been out the whole of today.

ke rumah bakal mertua *ehem*, seterusnya rumah bestfriend ipar, moksu ipar, cousin ipar,

& tadi lebih kurang 2215hrs baru sampai rumah.

hajat tinggi menggunung,

since the other half nak balik rumah awal untuk deliver some stuff,

then sambung lepak dengan rakan-rakan,

kononnya i want to spend the rest of the night ada lagi 2 jam lebih kurang ni untuk buat research for the project paper thingy.

elok-elok je laptop on bunyi music windows tu,

phone berbunyi,

nombor tak kenal,

suara lelaki,

"hey lya.. this is your friend, dan.."

aku dah crack dah apesal dan ismail nak adopt such a gedik-hesitant-ramah mesra tone on me.

ooohh wait..

kawan nama dan bukan ada sorang je!

so long story short,

i'm going to go watch the chealsea-man u game, yes believe it or not,

in about 11 minutes time.

sumpah demi Allah website emerald dah terbukak dah kat tab atas ni.

tinggal wa nak print screen tunjuk bukti je.

tapi malas.

tadi dah pun bukak istudent konon nak carik past research papers, etc,

carik ilham la kononnya,

tapi error amende tah dia taknak load.

so nampaknya....

esok-esok lah ye.

ada 2 bulan lagi koooot..

chillll~

Sole Mate (freestyle)

this apparently impromptu jam session while waiting for the laundry to finish is soooo effingly much better than the songs we hear on the radio nowadays. i am officially only posting ryan higa's videos on my blog. lolz.

he whom is named after a female bodypart.

you don't need 10 or 20 years to be able to look back at something from a different angle,

& learn so much from it.

sometimes all it takes are 3 or 4 years,

& a person whom you thought never changed,

but actually changed so much.

for the better, trust me.

to the bestfriend,

exboyfriend,

seldommeetbutcloseatheartfriend,

makanmaggihotcuptepilongkangpukul4pagifriend,

whatever i get to call you,

that speech went much deeper than i expected.

a session should be in order,

soon!

& this is why you shouldn't complain when you had a bad day, or week.

THIS.

is my fucking dream coming true.

i can't..

i can't even begin..

fuck.

yeah i can process it alright,

i'm just being torn in a million different directions

between fucking yelling at the top of my lungs & jumping til i break my knees,

& keeping quiet & collected because i don't want to jinx it because really,

one month is a lot of time for things to go wrong & not happen.

but fuck doh!

THIS IS ONE FUCKING BAND I NEVER EVEN DREAMED TO ENTER MALAYSIA.

you notice how many fucks have been in my post?

yes.

so i can't even begin to digest what i'm feeling right now.

WEHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

AKU DENGAR FIRST ALBUM DORANG NONSTOP DARI AKU 16 TAHUN KOT!

SAMPAI SEKARANG!

WEHHHHHHHHHH

just got in :)

i just realized i'm on my way to becoming the dark lord himself.

phoenix feather, slytherin house..

awesome!

& now i can finally say,

between gryffindor & slytherin,

yes i chose slytherin :)

------

added at 0040hrs

more on pottermore.

i don't like the fact that i feel so detached from the characters in the book,

especially the trio.

when we're reading the book, we always feel like we're a part of those 3,

we feel so close to them,

yet in pottermore we're our own entity, almost as if we don't even know those 3.

yes it's about creating our own hogwarts experience,

but what's hogwarts without everyone?

& i'd love to see more of our own houses,

like maybe walk around the common room,

lie on our bed in the dorms,

or maybe have to give the password everytime we want to enter the common room,

just like how it is in hogwarts.

oh & i'd love to walk around the corridors & bump into peeves or something..

there should be more games/challenges,

i don't know exactly what,

but yeah..

i mean where's the quidditch part?

i remember the old WB harry potter website had this lame-ish quidditch game,

but i spent hours on that thing!

oh & what's most disappointing is that i totally skipped all of the story (except for the new stuff from jk rowling) because i was too excited to collect galleons & stuff.

it felt so mystery case files-ish,

& totally not harry potter-ish.

i don't know..

i'm just tired of waiting for my potion to finish brewing.

95 minutes, seriously?

Lying down on my bed upside down,
Using the comforter as my pillow & hugging the bolster kontot tight,
Foetal position,
the kaftan you gave,
Fish light on & fan oscillating,
I am so proud of myself that after 8 full days,
& lotsa tantrums,
I am here, right now, miserable,
& not someplace else, with company, enjoying myself.
I am also very proud of spending the past few days watching friends, kardashians & obsessively playing Sims social,
Oh & also binge eating.
Very proud.
Not sarcastic.

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i've always kind of thought that one shouldn't have to have a reason,

or a reminder,

to stay.

as mentioned in my previous post,

we should always live our lives for ourselves.

but

looking through old pictures,

i stumbled across one,

not even a picture,

just a print screen,

that i guess slapped me?

gave me a wake up call?

one line that made complete sense,

without actually making that much sense.

tagged to a picture of you

"because none of it was ever worth the risk"

what led you to becoming the E.

the only exception.

it all sounds so dramatic,

doesn't it?

but yeah i guess that's why people (& magazines) always advice you to spend some time apart,

because missing is so excruciatingly beautiful.